Student days in Seoul, A persistent spirit

Student days in Seoul

Most of you here appear to be around twenty years old, between seventeen and twenty-one, which reminds me of when I was as young as you, struggling as I sought this way as a pioneer. I came to Seoul to attend school. I experienced culture shock. It was such a different environment from that of Chongju, my hometown, which was in a remote rural area. Seoul was such a big city. I remember many things that I did in order to try to fit into that new environment.

When I was your age, I did not talk much. How could I say anything when I had not found the way [the truth] and was still seeking my path? You should train yourself to be confident enough to feel that if you open your mouth, nobody can stand in your way. You cannot enlighten yourself in a drifting, rowdy environment. You cannot sink deep roots there.

A humble person is not arrogant even if he is very capable. No one can take such a person lightly. We tend to take comfort from such a person, someone with a strong personal sense of identity. Even in the old days, I was like that. My classmates took me very seriously, even more seriously than they took the teachers. It was not because I threatened them or used force.

In middle school, I used to clean the whole school. Because I wanted to love the school more than anyone else, I thought I would clean the building as a representative of the student body. When I was thinking like that, I didn't welcome others' help.

Even without talking much, I became a close friend of many of my classmates. When they were in agony, they came to me to discuss things. When they received money from their parents, they used to ask me to keep it for them, saying that it would make them feel safe even if the money might be stolen from me.

A persistent spirit of inquiry

Do you have any idea how many teachers hid from me, not being able to answer my questions? I used to ask, "Who created the formula and definitions in the physics textbook?" I do not believe them. Can you explain them to me clearly? I did not believe anything until I verified it myself. When a math teacher taught me a formula, I chased after the teacher and asked him about it. "Who came up with such a formula?" I felt terrible because somebody else had come up with it before I had. I felt I should have been the one... [Laughter] I was digging deeper and deeper. There was no skimping. Doing things cursorily would not work with me.

Even from middle school, I used to give my teachers a hard time, asking many questions. When they were not able to give clear answers, I went to the library to research topics by myself and showed the teachers the answers.

Even when I studied for a test only the day before, things mostly worked out. I divided the lecture content based on the probability of material appearing in the exam and just focused on the parts with a high likelihood, ignoring the rest. When I prepared for a test based on a psychological analysis of how I would do things if I were a teacher, I was right about 70 percent of the time... However hard one studies, one cannot remember everything. Some things tend to slip through.

Physical training

From the day I dreamed of this great revolution of heart and received an order from Heaven that said unless I was strong and healthy, I would not be able to accomplish this great undertaking, I started tough physical training. I am strong and capable of easily defeating a couple of attackers that come at me together. There is no exercise that I have not done. I trained myself everyday, day and night, until I was twenty-two.

I learned to box. I can do it even now. If I come across a bad man on the street, I can wrestle him down. A man should learn self-defense skills. I can jump over a fence even though I am kind of chubby. [Laughter] Because I went through that training, I can make all these movements look natural. Nobody will beat me in Korean wrestling either. [Laughter]

I am also good in such sports as soccer. Despite my rather large frame, I'm fast. In my younger days, I did all kinds of exercises, even on the horizontal bars. Even now I do exercises that no one else knows. I developed my own exercises. Do you want to learn them? [Yes.] How much would you pay me? [Laughter]

When the body is trained, a base for the spiritual world is established. You then become a real man who will not float away. You should be bold and confident with the authority of the eldest son.

Speech training

If I want to speak fast, I can say ten words in the time it takes you to say one. Hurrrr... [Laughter] I worked hard to become a champion at that. After people in Pyong-an Province say one word, they have to think over (around ten times) what they will say next. When I came to Seoul, a lady with thin lips and small eyes at the lodging house where I stayed spoke so quickly, without pausing for breath, as she explained about the town. [Laughter] I thought, "I will speak faster than she does," and I did beat her after lots of practice. [Laughter] The most difficult sound to pronounce was ddi. I wrote down such sounds as gal, nal, dal, lal, and practiced pronouncing them fast each morning and night.

That's how I trained myself. Why did I do it? I wanted to learn to say everything I wanted to say right away, once I started talking. Hurrrr... [Laughter] Pour out everything from head to toe. For six months, in a small room, I practiced pronouncing all kinds of sounds, including the Korean alphabet. I practiced until I grasped all the pronunciation. That's how I came to speak fast. It's possible for a person to improve even the way he or she speaks.

When I was in my teens, I loved music. The owner of the lodging house where I lived had been a chauffeur. He was the eldest son of a wealthy man somewhere in Gangwon Province. At that time, about thirty years ago, a chauffeur was a good occupation. There was no place he had not been to in Korea. He knew all kinds of folk songs and had hundreds of albums. I devised a plan to impress the landlady, the owner's wife. I greeted her every day and carried the dining table for her; and I ran errands for her. As I carried out my plan in this way for a couple of days, she developed affection for me. She liked me so much she even said she would make me her son-in-law. All right! From then on, she lent me all the albums I wanted. [Laughter] I listened to all the recordings. Even if I borrowed several albums at a time, the owner did not mind. To listen to all the music over several days, I played the albums twenty-four hours a day! [Laughter]

It is good to sing well. A man who feels devoted to his mother sings while he massages her back. A young couple should sing well if they want to express the love in their hearts.

As a front-runner in charge of the providence of restoration, I need to realize my goals somehow, don't I? All of this has to do with my course. It was a foundation for my course. What did I do when sleeping at night? I played the songs under the blanket at a low volume. I go to extremes. Whatever I do, I do not want to be second to anyone. You should learn how to sing.

A one-man show

God is very capable. He would say, "This rascal!" You are shameless. You rascal! He is also very good at joking. God is the king of humor...Taking after God, I am good at humor and improvisation.

During my middle and high-school years, I was a champion at one-man shows. At the school talent show when I performed, many parents would come to watch.

Having that quality is one reason I hold the position of founder of the Unification Church. Do you think it is easy to be in this position? [Laughter] Although church members are persecuted outside, you have fun once you come inside the church, don't you? [Yes.] That's because I put on a good one-man show. [Laughter]

It is not a one-man show, but a real-man show. It is a real man's performance.

In the old days, I liked to throw pebbles into the gentle waves of the Han River. It is better to do that in the evening than in the morning. Seeing people boating on the river against the evening glow is very beautiful, as the sun, which had been burning hot during the day, is setting behind them. Wind up a round, flat stone and throw it. It flies gently, skimming over the water; it appears to glide across on the river. Do you sense that feeling? [Laughter]

In my hometown, there were no persimmon trees. Although I had seen the fruit, I had never seen its mother. What is a persimmon's mother? Isn't it a tree? Of course, that mother grows from a seed in the beginning. In those days, a persimmon, a red-ripe persimmon, well... When I eat persimmons, I do not eat just one. If we have persimmons at home, I eat them all. [Laughter] Eating is my hobby. I like to eat very much.

In Seoul, I saw persimmon trees. At a glance, the fruit appeared to be quite hard and beautiful, although it was not big. I had a friend living outside the Jahamun. [The fortress wall that used to surround Seoul had four major and four minor gates Jahamun, in northern Seoul, is one of the minor ones.] One day I went to see him. The persimmons near his house had turned golden in color and looked so tasty. My friend and I sneaked into the place where the trees were and picked some of them. [Laughter]

Boardinghouse life

I lived in a boardinghouse for seven years, but not because I didn't have money. I lived there as a way of learning more about a woman's lifestyle. When I was cooking, I never used warm water. I just drew water from a well with a bucket. In cold weather, my hands stuck to the bucket. With that water, I cleaned rice and cooked it.

When I first came to Seoul, it was quite cold. The average temperature ranged from minus 17 C to minus 21 C. When I was young, that kind of weather was common. Wherever I went, I did not live like a rich person. I started from the bottom. Those were cold winter months.

I don't need many side dishes. It is almost a habit. I only need one simple, tasty, practical side dish. I always had one tasty side dish per meal. That's enough.

You can tell if someone is a novice cook or not by watching how the person uses a cutting board. I am pretty good at that -- tututuck, tuttituck... [Laughter]. You can easily tell whether someone has a knack for cooking by watching how he or she prepares a side dish. When I look at a woman making rice and side dishes, I can tell how much water she used and what kind of seasoning she used. [From the Korean perspective, rice is the main dish of a meal.] With a cursory glance, I know these things.

Fasting and enduring

During my school days in Seoul, at your age, I did not eat lunch. It was not because I did not have rice. To understand the hungry days of your parents, you should know the circumstances and story behind those days. You should strive to develop into dutiful sons or daughters by putting yourselves in a situation where you experience hunger and during that time repenting for not having been pious toward your parents. That's what I think.

You are closest to God when you are hungry. When you are extremely hungry, you look at people walking by as you might your mother or your sister, as people who can help you. Under those circumstances, you find you are able to comfort and embrace millions of people.

I was also asking myself whether I was qualified to eat three meals a day when we had no country of our own. I maintained a lifestyle of going hungry for a long time. I experienced a longing for my fellow man when I missed food.

I thought I should love my country and fellow man more than I loved food. I thought in this way as I traveled from my hometown to Seoul. When I did not eat lunch, it was not because I didn't have money. I gave money to people in need.

I fasted just as often as I ate meals. I did not have lunch until I was thirty years old. I left home when my appetite was heaviest and continued to have only two meals a day. Probably, no one has been as hungry as I have. I hear the clamor of hungry people longing for help and liberation. That makes it difficult for me to eat. Those who pursue enlightenment and an ascetic life should practice it in everyday situations.

I often fasted on my birthday. Can you celebrate your birthday without establishing a foundation of victory on an individual level, a family level, a national level, and the world level? How can you dance and do such things? You cannot. A sinner can do that only after accomplishing the responsibility God gave him. I led that kind of lifestyle.

I was in a position to offer tearful prayers wherever I was, so people tended to feel sympathetic toward me without knowing why. Also, wherever I went, there were many people who treated me as you do now. There were incidents where women whose families lodged in the same houses I did offered me food they had prepared for their husbands, or for holidays, before they could take it to their own rooms. They did not even know why they did it. God moved their hearts, so that He could feed me the food they'd prepared with all their hearts. This happened many times. I have not forgotten about this expression of God's love even in my sleep.

I cannot forget one particular lady. Her family name was Song, and she was rather poor. At the time, she was living in a rented room with her daughter. She did not have a husband. She was living off the tiny store she was running. When she came across some food to feed herself, she said her hands took it to me instead. There was a time when two churches sometimes held joint services on the banks of the Han River, on a beach that once existed near Seobingo. [A district in central Seoul on the north side of the Han River] I When lunchtime came, I could not stay in the middle of the crowd. I left the group and sat for a while on a pile of stones, thinking. At that time, the lady, Mrs. Song, brought me two slices of bread and two ice creams. I still cannot forget that. What a serious time it was. You can never forget such indebtedness.

From this, you should understand how precious it is to visit people in their time of loneliness. People liking likable people does not seem to mean much At that time, I learned that it is noble to visit and comfort people when they are going through difficulty.

A cold room in the winter

When I was in my twenties, winters in Seoul were quite cold. The average temperature seems to have been around minus 17 C. The Han River always froze in the winter then. In that kind of weather, I lived in a room without heating. I put a damask mat on the floor and slept on it. In the morning, the design on the mat would be imprinted on the cold floor. Those marks were not easily erased; they used to stay for six months. That made an impression on me that lingers in my memory.

To overcome the cold, I used to sleep with a light bulb burning under the blanket to keep myself warm. Occasionally, though, I got burned by it. I still remember that. When I think of Seoul, that experience comes to mind. Even now, when I sit in the bathtub, I recall those days.

It was as if I were a criminal; I endured a path of suffering that no one else could have. You should not forget the historical suffering of your teacher and that of God. You should keep it deep in your heart. When you meet me in heaven later, you can hug me and say, "I was aware of your sorrowful situation and tried to live up to that standard, but I was not able to do it. Please, forgive me." If you do that with a tearful, grief-stricken heart, even God will hold you and cry with you. Unless such a day comes, I don't believe the day of liberation will arrive. A devoted son, even if he is living in an unheated, cold room, should remain a devoted son. You should cherish the sorrowful heart of parents whom you attend from a cold room. You must have a penitent heart for not being able to love the whole of heaven and earth. You should also know that only if you have that kind of heart will the path to Heaven be nearby.

I did not wear clothes like those you are wearing until I was thirty. Life was like that during the Japanese occupation. We used to buy secondhand clothes that were worn-out, dirty and shiny in spots. When I wore good clothes, many girls followed me. To avoid that, I used to take untraveled, narrow streets and keep my hair unkempt. A man must lay the foundation to achieve his goals, once they are set.

I am good at knitting. I sometimes knitted a sweater by myself and socks, too. I have made socks, underpants and jackets on my own. I did a lot of research on how to live alone without a woman's help. I had determined to pursue God's will as my lifelong business even if I had to live alone. There is nothing I cannot do. I can quickly knit nice-looking hats or gloves.

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